Grief – Time for creativity?

When we lose someone, when we break up, when we experience grief because of the situation you are in, you can look at it from a different angle. The several stages of grief are experienced so differently for each one of us, but everyone will experience sadness as part of the healthy grieving process.

I want to explore with you another way of looking at the sadness and gaining a new perspective on it.

You see, previously I used to either drown in sadness, by crying my eyes out and eventually become a victim to a situation and asking myself questions such as: “Why is it so unfair? Why me? why is it happening now?” And then making promises such as: “I never allow myself to experience it again! I will never allow myself to open my heart to anyone, just to get hurt again and again”.

OR

I used to numb the sadness with alcohol and binges, running away from it, being all scared and judging myself. Another unhealthy way as I was not letting myself to sit with the feeling at all. I was scared of it and what it was going to do to me. It was not healthy either as I kept pushing it away and the Universe presented me more times and more moments to experience sadness.

Now I handle it completely differently. What is the difference between now and then?

You see, it all comes down to the perspective you take, you either think that life is happening to you or life is happening for you. It is a huge difference! First one most likely puts you more often in a victim position as mentioned above, the other one (described below) uplifts and creates more abundance in your life. It is all about how you choose to view the grieving process.

I view sadness as a form of expansion into creativity and into something more powerful. For me it is a source of creativity and breaking even more fears and rules around life and experiences. I could choose to close my heart, but I choose to open it even more wide to receive everything on a much deeper level. I noticed that once I sit with the feeling, I start losing so many fears. It makes me brave to do more, to achieve more, to set up new goals and desires. You can completely change the direction of your life, make better decisions and really honor this process of healing. Let this person, relationship, situation go with a feeling of gratitude, acceptance and love.

Sadness is what makes us wise, because during this time, it is absolutely essential to analyze and review what went wrong, what good did it bring to you, what not so good things it has done to you, why was it happening, what can you learn from it? And most likely, it is a perfect opportunity for you to understand what are the most important things in your life and focus on them going forward. It is your choice, whether you want to view it as something painful, so hard to navigate through or give it another purpose and meaning to evolve it into creativity and gratitude.

You can feel into your heart, feel how it is hurting in pain, visualise your heart contracting together, but then pouring light into it, pouring love into it and turning that into a beautiful energy that can create a lot of creativity and expansion into your life. When the heart is ready to go bigger, deeper and reopen again, let the joy of life come back to you, let the feeling of gratitude sink in. Things that you are grateful for that this person has brought to you, the love that was given to you, the qualities he-she has brought up in you. Watch the sadness raise up to a different level of energy, the one that helps you to grow. And realise, that you will never be the same. And that is a good thing, you can be more the goodness of you.

When you let go with gratitude and love, you create more of this into your life. You gain more freedom, it creates more space for something beautiful to come into your life. This is the way I choose to think about it. It is the end of something beautiful but could also be a beginning of something more beautiful.

It is just a process, and we can turn this into something that works for you and makes you operate on a whole other level. Try not to judge yourself through it and make yourself feel so bad about yourself, use it as a great energy to evolve yourself into an even better person, even better soul. Behind every situation, even a painful one, there is a hidden blessing, you just need to find it. Tap into this feeling and see what it came to tell you, what have you missed, where have you gone wrong in your life and what can you cherish going forward.

Love you much,

Oksana